News

Government Investigation

Our writer Mr. Davis received a visit from government investigators asking whether we had anything to do with those lights in the sky reported by military pilots. Mr. Davis told them that all we do is make comics. He said that the last thing we would want is to cause trouble for a planet where we’re trying so hard to fit in. The investigators said they were acting on a tip. One thing we know is that the Beacons of Night recently blamed us for the lights in the sky. When Lmao invented a ray gun he said his planet’s police were so interested that they were beating down the door.

First Contact: Message Sent

Twenty-five years ago, using our newly built internet transceiver, we found a chat room hosted by the king who owns Alien Resort island. We typed a message, telling him who and where we were, and waited. Finally, his three word reply: “Good God Almighty.”

After the king’s initial surprise, he said that since we weren’t causing him any trouble, we were welcome to remain on the island. He also asked if we needed any supplies. We cheered. Our spaceship storerooms were empty and we were tired of eating fresh fish and exotic tropical fruits. Lmao’s ancestors were forest dwellers; he says he has pictures of the family tree.

It’s Already Tomorrow

The kingdom that includes Alien Resort island is an archipelago. The kingdom’s closest neighbor is the Northern Mariana islands. These islands are seven hours from Hawaii and are located west of the international date line. The king will pick up our writer and his wife in the NMI capital Saipan. A Saipan travel office was going to arrange a fishing boat for the trip to Alien Resort but the king wouldn’t hear it. Deadpan once told the enemy he was going fishing; he says they took the bait.

Coy at the Helm

I wrote in an earlier post about how Mr. Davis has given me permission to help answer comments. He also said I could comment on other websites if the author doesn’t mind. I have even had conversations with dogs who narrate blog posts. Some of the Earthlings I have talked to say I’m different from what they expected. They say I’m just like them. I explain that I’ve been using the internet for 25 years. Deadpan says he once forgot his dog’s name but it finally came to him.

First Contact: the Internet

About twenty-five years ago Plucky picked up a signal from one of Earth’s artificial satellites. “I didn’t know Earth was using this frequency,” she said. “I could build a transceiver.” Within a month we were receiving internet messages. We found out that Alien Resort island is part of a kingdom–we decided to contact the king. Plucky thinks it’s possible to construct a living creature; Deadpan said it would take a lot of nerve.

Telepathy Lessons

Plucky is teaching Deadpan how to use telepathy. He says he isn’t getting it. Whenever Plucky speaks aloud, she talks about technical issues like radar and satellites. Deadpan says he isn’t receiving these kinds of messages telepathically. Instead all he hears is what he describes as mushy things. He says he’ll keep trying. Lmao says he once met someone in gyroscope school–they were soon going steady.

First Contact: Radio

During our early years on Earth, when we had nothing to do, Plucky would monitor her radio receiver for signals from space. Around the year 1920 she began to pick up signals from far-off Earth radio broadcasts. We didn’t understand the language at that time, but we were able to enjoy the music that was played. These days we have YouTube: I like jazz, Plucky likes pop, Deadpan listens only to Kraftwerk (e.g., Autobahn), and Lmao likes punk. Back then we needed a dance floor; Lmao knew how to cut a rug.